5 Biopics That Need A Makeover

by TV One Staff

June 1, 2016

Have you heard? We’re releasing the first ever Unsung feature film about Miki Howard starring Teyonah Parris!

Love Under New Management: The Miki Howard Story is something we are really proud of and cant wait to share with you on Sunday, June 12 7/6c!

We understand that the waters of biopics can be very treacherous and we are treading lightly. We’ve already pinpointed 5 biopics that are in desperate need of a makeover and we promise not to make the same mistakes:

1. NINA (Nina Simone)

WHY IT WAS SO BAD: Jesus be a casting director because the casting for this film was simply terrible. Although we’re not completely annoyed with Zoe Saldana’s acting abilities (we saw Drumline) we were definitely annoyed that this Afro-Latin actress needed a prosthetic nose and dark makeup to play Nina Simone, the high priestess of Soul. Wouldn’t it have been easier (and cheaper) to use a dark-skinned actress with a (naturally) wider nose? We would have loved to see Viola Davis murk (in a good way) this role. Did you all catch this movie in theaters? No? That’s because it went straight to VOD, the best decision made about this biopic.


2. AALIYAH: THE PRINCESS OF R&B (Aaliyah)

WHY IT WAS SO BAD: So y’all just gone slap anything together for Baby Girl? For this biopic, we really Need A Resolution ( see what we did there?). First off, if we’re going to do a biopic about Aaliyah (or any artist) there should be approval from their family/estate. Apparently Aaliyah’s family wanted nothing to do with the film, which means Aaliyah’s music had nothing to do with the film, which is the ultimate recipe for a horrible biopic. And let’s not get started with the casting. Really? A light skinned, skinny Missy Elliott? And can we stop playing and give Keshia Chante, the role of Aaliyah? The girl was born for this. If they can get this biopic right we don’t doubt that it will do phenomenally on the big screen.


3. MAN IN THE MIRROR: THE MICHAEL JACKSON STORY (Michael Jackson)

WHY IT WAS SO BAD: Uh-Uh! Flex Alexander knows he’s wrong for this. I mean, we get the hustle. Who would want to pass up the opportunity to play the most iconic artist in the world? But still, every opportunity isn’t the right opportunity for you and this is a perfect example. This entire film seemed like a Michael Jackson parody instead of an actual biopic. We get it Flex, you can do a mean Michael Jackson impersonation, but that is where it should have stopped. To pull off an epic Michael Jackson biopic is an amazing feat that will require casting an actor that can play Michael in his different eras. Maybe this requires casting several actors for each era or just focusing on one era, with an actor that actually resembles Michael. Moral of the story: if you have to change your skin complexion to play another human being, the role isn’t for you.


4. JIMI: ALL IS BY MY SIDE (Jimi Hendrix)

WHY IT WAS SO BAD: We actually weren’t upset with the casting for this movie. We think its pretty cool to see our favorite weird-but-cool rapper, Andre “3000” Benjamin on screen as Jimi Hendrix. Unfortunately, as with many horrible biopics, the estate did not approve and Jimi’s music was not used in the entire film. If we can’t have the music with the biopic, we don’t want the biopic. Point. Blank. Period.


5. GLITTER (Mariah Carey)

WHY IT WAS SO BAD: Okay, okay, we know that this isn’t a biopic but somehow it makes us want to see an actual Mariah Carey biopic. This movie was a commercial failure (it’s soundtrack came out on September 11,2001, the day of the World Trade Center attacks and the movie followed a few weeks later.) and is a career move that Mariah regrets to this very day. To be honest we weren’t mad at this film, Mariah Carey’s acting was okay, the singing was good, the story line…eh, a little predictable, but not bad. Let’s give Mariah another shot at an epic film by casting another actor or artist to play her (ahem, Ariana?), a juicy story line, with Mariah’s approval and music.


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